“Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti
I would lie awake at night aching for rest and relief from my racing mind. Hot milk with honey, yoga postures with my feet above my head, no chocolate after three in the afternoon—I had tried it all.
I was weaning myself off sleeping pills. Wrenching myself from my love affair with the tiny white disc. I’d pop it under my tongue to slide from the shackles of adrenaline. They felt impossible to escape.
I’d started using sleeping pills in my last semester of university, having begged my doctor for a prescription to stop the torture of lying awake night after night. One day running straight into the next, and the next, and the next. An endless horror-film loop.
I felt lost.
It wasn’t a new feeling. I’d felt that way for years.
I’d lie awake and wonder why I didn’t feel better, wish I could feel like everyone else seemed to—content, confident, happy. Why wasn’t that my life?
And then, one day, I decided to see what else was possible. If I could feel a different way. …